Spread your wings and fly

I remember waking up two years ago in a tent on a rainy day and feeling sick to the stomach
What the hell was I thinking, to stand practically naked all day whilst my body was painted
A few months before the lovely Liz Bylett had posted for models for the living art show and I thought ooh that sounds fun but it was so much more than that, we were to be painted as butterflies and the transformation was to signify setting ourselves free from sexual trauma and this had been a big part of my journey in the two years before
The butterfly held huge significance for me, it's the image I often picture as I release, I spread my wings and fly
On the way to the marquee, I went into a total panic, I went live on my page and said I can't do this, everyone will be staring at me, I'm fat, disgusting, all those old beliefs started to come up, I felt so overwhelmed , help.. I was then showered with so much love and I felt so held, makes me teary now as I remember how nourishing that felt
And then I met the beautiful Kellie Driscoll and what a beautiful soul to paint me, I told her how I was feeling and she was AMAZING and I feel so blessed to have met her and to call her a dear friend
What a day, what an experience that I will never ever forget
That evening, I took to the catwalk, I felt proud, so liberated and so free
Freedom presents itself in different ways and as I take each step, I feel more and I know there is so much more to come too
So if you ever think you won't be free, free from your past, free from your mind and the things you say to yourself, know that you absolutely can, its about believing it can happen and having the courage to take that first step, to spread your wings and fly 🦋









